Sunday, November 7, 2010

I am The Greatest Entertainer on Earth

As I've said before, we recently moved out of the city to Tuen Mun, where we're among the very, very few gweilos. As such, we're the object of much fascination (and by "fascination'" I mean "staring"). And if we speak Cantonese the entertainment factor is ratcheted up about five billion notches. So today I was shopping and had a conversation that went something like this (the conversation was in Canto - this is the English translation):

[I'm walking through the mall and I see a shirt hanging in a shop window. I go into the shop.]
Me: Excuse me! How much is this? [I point to the shirt in the window]
Shopgirl: giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle
Me: This one. [pointing again]
Shopgirl: giggle giggle gigglegigglegigglegiggle!
[she takes down the shirt and shows me the price tag. I look it over, decide I want it]
Me: Okay, I want it.
[she rings me up and starts to put the shirt in a bag]
Me: I don't want a bag, thanks.

But it was all worth it, because here is my excellent new shirt (please also note the leg warmers that I got at the same mall):

And yesterday I almost shut down an entire supermarket by walking into a column while texting. This caused uproarious laughter, but it was when I cursed in Cantonese that the situation neared critical hilarity threshold and everyone around me almost completely lost their minds. I could still hear the laughter when I was three aisles away, and I had four kids follow me throughout the market waiting for the gweilo to do something else ridiculous. You know, like talk. Or exist.

I am a rock star.

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