I will never get it right.

In an uncharacteristically grown-up move, Kelly and I invited our new mainland neighbors over for coffee.  I'd met the wife on a previous occasion - dragging home from a drunken trip to the store, dripping in sweat, she invited me in for coffee.  I declined and, at her insistence, foggily programmed her number into my phone.

A few days later in a brief moment of clarity I realized that we have to live next to these people, so I should play nice.  That brief moment didn't last long.

But then, a few nights (and beers) later, I decided that we MUST have them over soon.  We're adults!  We get to know our neighbors!  That's what grown-ups do!  (Right?)

So after a few texts back and forth, it was settled that they'd come over for coffee.  She would bring cake.  Great.

They arrive.  Kelly makes coffee for himself and the husband of the couple, but the wife and I don't drink coffee so we had water.  Yes, I guess I could've offered tea.  But I am a crap hostess (as further reading will prove to you).

There were four of us - Kelly and me, and the neighbor couple - and she had brought four little cakes from the local bakery.  Perfect!  Because I'm so considerate, I'd taken the time to go out and get small dessert plates so we could all have cake together.  So cozy.

We put the four cakes out on the table, start chatting - "So, how do you like the new house... Oh that's great... Some weather we're having!..." etc. - and I'm getting hungry.  So I grab a cake and start eating.

Dammit.

Everyone looks at me a bit oddly, but they take this as a cue to start eating. And to start CUTTING UP EACH CAKE INTO PIECES.  I somehow forgot the "sharing" thing that goes on in Chinese culture.  I just swiped one whole cake for me, when it should've been shared among us.  The three of them had bits of the remaining cakes while I silently swallowed my shame cake.

I am a Western barbarian and an ass.

But I took the tastiest cake, so I'm not sad.  

Dumpster diving in Sai Kung

Walking by the giant heap of rubbish dumpsters the other day, I noticed several mannequin bits.  Who the hell would throw away perfectly good half-bodies??

Hong Kongers will rummage through the trash to salvage a chair with three legs, but aren't jumping all over these?  I will never understand this culture.

They are now adorning my garden and classing up the neighborhood.

Vicente

I posted several days ago about my garden and how lush it's become in the subtropical saunahellfire of Hong Kong.  And, right on cue, last night Hong Kong hosted its first Level 10 typhoon since 1999.  Here's what those plants look like now:

And here's a video of what it looked like outside my window around 5:30 am:

We're still at Typhoon Level 8 - which means stay inside, businesses are closed, no public transport - and my husband just left for the airport to fly to Olso.  On Aeroflot.

Aeroflot is the reason that I have to take anti-anxiety pills (or several glasses  bottles of wine) before I fly.  In 1989 on a flight from Moscow to Leningrad we nearly crashed - routine business for Aeroflot - and amongst the screaming, the dropped oxygen masks, and the undercooked chicken and odd orange caviar that was the dinner service flying everywhere, a phobia was born.

Aeroflot is, of course, one of the few airlines that did not cancel flights today.  Initially excited because my handsome vegetarian husband was leaving town (which means I get to eat meat!), I have now resigned myself to the fact that I may never see him again.  (Which means I get to eat meat!)

The Hong Kong Observatory reports that we'll soon be downgraded to Typhoon Level 3, so perhaps his flight will take off safely.  Which means I only have five days to indulge in BaconFest 2012.  Who's with me?

Instead of "CAUTION: STAIRS" ...

Um... thanks?

Me, at the garden store this morning:  "Hm.  These citronella candles are pretty expensive.  Do they work?

Employee:  "People die.  Mosquito never die."

What one month in a subtropical environment will do for your garden

We recently moved to Sai Kung and for the first time have a rooftop garden, so we put in a few small plants.   We then promptly left for a one-month vacation in the States, asking our helper to water them a couple of times a week.  Here are the before and after photos.

Coleus and periwinkle:

 One month later:

More coleus, some sort of flower that I forget the name of, and eggplants:

Then Thai basil, lemon balm, and basil:

And one month later:

Should I be scared?

How did he know to use the crosswalk?

I was walking back from the market with a bag full of watermelon and wine (don't you judge me) when suddenly, water buffalo!