I'm dreaming of a sweaty Christmas

This year's winter has been the hottest I've experienced here.  This is what mid-December looks like in Hong Kong:  80-something degrees and unimaginable humidity.  

Santa's had a stroke and all of the elves are naked and panting on the beach.  And my sweaty bra is hung out to dry by the fireplace* with care.

*And by "fireplace" I mean "air conditioner."

It's the most wonderful time of the year

Fish balls roasting on an open fire

mosquitoes nipping at your toes

drunken K-pop being sung by that guy

and folks dressed up like rich gweilos...

Everybody knows some charcoal and a roasting spit

help to make the evening right

tiny tots at the next BBQ pit

will have nightmares of strange white people tonight...

We know the last bus is on its way

the driver won't wait for us at all

but there's still beer so we'll stay

and try to hail a red cab back to Central...

And so I'm spending another Hong Kong day

like expats since 1842

though it's been slurred many times many ways

"Where's the 7-11?  We need more booze."

Cold, hard (and refreshing!) cash

In today's news from Shenzhen: a woman receives a phone call telling her that she owes 15,000 yuan to the government and she must pay by 5 pm.  But not to worry - if she pours coca-cola on an ATM it will spit out money!  So of course she immediately proceeds to the nearest ATM and dumps three cokes into it.  Shockingly, this does not work.  She is then arrested as she moves on and attempts to do the same thing at a different ATM.

Because China.

Clockenflap - you still have time!

If you missed Clockenflap yesterday, you still have time to get there today.  There are tickets still available and this year is infinitely better organized than last year.  Also with excellent food - tacos, pizza, noodles, dumplings, brats, pastries - get there now!